How to Become More Grateful for Everything - Gratitude Practice

Show Notes:
Gratitude is helpful on several levels. It can help strengthen relationships, help reduce stress, healthier physical body because you might end up lowering your blood pressure, fostering stronger resilience, and having a more positive mindset. But the thing I love the most about gratitude is how it magnifies our Lord and Savior in everything He does for us.

Psalm 9:1, “I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done.”

Also, the opportunity to thank God for anything & everything is always there. So if it’s easier to show gratitude by thanking someone, thank Him. 

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, “Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.”

And when we show gratefulness, we need not forget all the hard stuff, and the lessons we learned, too. 

Another verse says, James 1:2-4, “My fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties, see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can! For you know that when your faith is tested it stirs up in you the power of endurance. And then as your endurance grows even stronger, it will release perfection into every part of your being until there is nothing missing and nothing lacking.”

When we give God all the glory, we stir up our own hearts to have stronger, deeper trust, belief & faith in Him, as well as honor Him in how He takes care of us & how He can take care of others, if they give their heart to Him.

When we practice gratitude, we remind ourselves that NOT everything in life is bad.  
Here are the 5 tips I would use when needing to know How to Become More Grateful for Everything:

1. Become More Mindful with Awe & Wonder
   1. Practice mindfulness by being present as much as possible.
   2. Experience the awe & wonder of everything around you. 
2. Practice Forgiveness & Acceptance
   1. Stop holding onto painful feelings & experiences for the sake of holding it against someone. 
   2. Become more accepting of unexpected situations. 
3. Give Back to Others
   1. Spend some time giving back to others, which will help you reflect on how blessed your own life is.
4. Comfort Negative Thoughts with Gratitude
   1. It’s healthy to express how you feel. Express how you feel & couple it with something positive that you’re grateful for. 
5. Keep a Log of Your Gratitude
   1. It could be a journal or the notes app on your phone but have a place you can write down what you are grateful for.

Transcript

0:03

This is the Real Positive Girl podcast and I am your host, Sabrina. And I'm here chatting with you about your emotions, your mental health struggles, and how to take those first few steps become, to become more honest, to become more vulnerable, and to develop more self-awareness. And we do that two times a week here. So if you are brand new, I welcome you in to this fun time of talking about our emotions, me going on tangents, trying to reel myself back in, adding in some Bible scriptures, and then offering you really good tips and advice on how we can become our best selves every single day. And if you are not new, welcome back to the party. You already know what this is all about. So today we are gonna be talking about how to become more grateful for everything. And I think it's gonna be a really good conversation that we're gonna have. And if you are already familiar with gratitude and being thankful for things, I still believe that you can learn a lot from this episode. So I hope that you still really enjoy it if it's already a practice that is in your life every single day. But before we dive into that topic, as always, I want to invite you to come say hi to me on social media. I am at Sabrina Joy Perso on both TikTok and Instagram. So please come say hi, send me a dm, let's become friends online. Let's chit chat. Let's get to know each other better. And tell me your favorite flavor of ice cream or froyo or dessert or food, whatever suits you best. And I just wanna become friends with you guys online. I'm also on Twitter sometimes. Uh, so if you peek down to the show notes, you will see my name for Twitter. Also, how to spell my name for Instagram and TikTok. Cause I know my last name is kind of fancy. And you know, I came from a small name that people would still spell wrong. And how I have a longer last name that people still spell wrong. So it's okay, it's all down in the show notes for you as well as how you can sign up for our right now, every other week newsletter, uh, to go hit the link, to hit the YouTube channel for the podcast and see video versions of the podcast that we were slowly becoming more up to date. How this is just a topic for the show, um, all kinds of things. So take a little peek down into the show notes and I hope to see you and chat with you soon on socials. But let's go ahead and jump into why we're here, which again, today's topic is how to become more grateful for everything. So for me personally, uh, gratitude isn't something that I have ever really struggled with. And I know that might sound like I am bragging, but to be honest, it just hasn't really been a struggle for me, and I'm really grateful for that. Isn't that funny? I am really grateful that gratitude and thankfulness, it's generally not a struggle for me. I am pretty sure that God just designed me that way and it actually, you know, helped me a lot because I believe that I am. So grateful for everything because of everything that I endured as a child and the things and the trauma and drama that I had to go through. And so, you know, I wasn't handed very much, you know, growing up and we had a lot of issues. And then when I was handed things or given the opportunity to have things and, and have experiences that I otherwise wouldn't if it weren't for certain people coming into my life, you know, by then I had a mature, matured enough to really understand, uh, how amazing that was. So I naturally just had a lot of gratitude for it. I had a lot of gratitude for someone, uh, close to me wanting to spend a bunch of money on a prom dress when I had no expectations for that. Or when I had, um, my sisters adopted mom, my sisters and my brothers adopted moms go out of her way to spend money, for me to have a really nice dress to go to junior prom and, and buy brand new with makeup at the Nordstrom counter, which was a lot of money for me when I was in high school. And so it's just like these things just came outta nowhere and I was just so grateful and, uh, astounded that someone would want to bless me in those ways. So I just feel like I naturally grew up, um, being blessed with this ability to recognize these blessings and be grateful. And, you know, I would definitely say that in that some people found me to, in the way that I would react and be grateful and thankful, uh, naive at times because either I was grateful for things that they weren't grateful for, so they didn't really see a point in it, which who cares about that really? Or, uh, I was grateful and thankful for things that everyone was afforded, and I just didn't realize it. And so they were like, oh my gosh, you're so silly. Why are you grateful? Everyone's getting the same thing? And I would like to say that regardless of whether everyone's getting the same thing or it's just your, or it's just a select group of people, we can still express gratitude for it. And so I do, and I, and I, and I say that because I have had people kind of like express it, like, why are you grateful for that? It's like, I'm grateful because I, I'm truly grateful and I feel like I'm being blessed by whatever it is that I'm granted, even if everyone in else in the world gets it. You know, it's just like I am super grateful for, uh, Christ dying on the cross and the love of God in Jesus, um, despite the fact that it's available for everyone to have if they want. And I'm still grateful for it every single day. So I don't think there's any problem with that. But I will say, I will say humbly that I do struggle with feeling grateful for, you know, really tough situations. You know, there were some that I could, like any tough situation or you know, struggle I had to go through, I could easily recognize like a learning opportunity where I'm like, okay, this will gimme a chance to learn how to do this and push through on that and, and whatever needed to happen. But, but there were many times, uh, that I lacked gratitude for a while. Like, even like after going through the experience and then there was still some time where I was lacking the gratitude or the thankfulness for being able to go through those times because it just didn't seem like it should be happening, right? And I'm sure that many of us have gone through that type of experience where we are telling ourselves, why are we going through this? Why do we have to experience this? We don't feel like we deserve it. We don't feel like it's fair and we don't find the gratitude in it until later. And I feel like that often happens when we've already made up our mind on a direction we wanna go, a goal and a dream that we wanna accomplish and hit life. And then we get turned into an opposite direction away from all of that. And so we're heartbroken, we're upset, we are not, we're not feeling grateful or thankful because we're not able to yet recognize it as something to be grateful for because we felt like we were so in control of everything. And then all of that disappeared, which I feel like happens to us at least once in our life, but probably multiple me multiple until I realized I just needed to let go of the control. Because I am not in control. God is solely in control of everything and we just need to, you know, like he to his way of life. But I feel like a lot of us go through that where we just get so upset that things aren't going our way, and then we don't realize that we actually were turned in a different direction to keep us out of danger or out of failure or out of like a direction that would probably we would prosper in, but also we would quickly fail after that or quickly like, you know, fall into something else. So we didn't need to. Um, but it's, I feel like it's perfectly natural for us to be like, oh my gosh, I'm so upset <laugh>, I can't find any gratitude. And, and it comes later. It's like, you know, when we are like, oh, now we have like 2020 vision looking back. Uh, but when we take the time to be grateful, which is something that is really important to me. And just to be honest, you know, I struggled a little bit with coming up with this topic for this week and the topics that I've recently spoken about here on the podcast have come naturally to me and spending time in prayer or Bible study and it just like, kind of like flows into it. But this time was a little bit more struggled and I so busy and overwhelmed that I haven't had as much time to, you know, make the time to be in my Bible and studying as much and as much of a flow with God and praying and everything. And I believe that's why I struggled. But as soon as I took a step back from the normal way that I tried to find myself to be inspired due to an episode, which is just to like spend some time on the web and looking at different places where I like save content, you know, like Pinterest or other photo sites. And I just took a step back and I opened the journal, my prayer bible journal that I use to write down thoughts and write down prayers and write down like anything that comes to me during devotional time or when God's speaking to me or whatever. And immediately this idea came immediately it was formed. It's like gratitude. You should talk about that. You should talk about how we can become more grateful every single day because it's also something that I am still working on, still practicing. How can I be more grateful in different ways and express it in different ways and be a good example of it for others to have that and wanna develop that habit and that practice as well. And it just goes to show you that when you try to force things in your own power, it's way more difficult to accomplish things. But when you allow God to speak to you, which is essentially what I was doing with like opening that journal and being like, you know, God, I just wanna like what have I been writing about? What have you been speaking to me about? What have we been connecting about? And it was right there. And so just allowing God to speak into our lives and lead us where we need to go makes life so much easier. But so back to what I was really just saying, cause that was just like out of my heart and not in my notes. When we take the time to be grateful, we allow ourselves a moment away from like all of our pressures, all of our struggles, all of our problems and our worries, uh, that we deal with on a regular basis. And I'm sure that we all feel this way where it just feels like there's this never-ending roster of things that we have to deal with. And when we, you know, compare it to all the things that bring us joy, it feels like it's a list that's longer than the happiest. And if you were someone that deals with like anxiety on the regular, it's even better <laugh>, it's an even better reprieve because constant and heavy anxiety can just like, really weigh you down and distract you from so many things in your life. So when you take the moment to actually be grateful, you're like, oh my gosh, this is like a vacation for my mind <laugh>. Um, and so gra I just want you to know that it's, it's more than just this like silly little thing that people are always in, you know, encouraging you do when you are imparting or practicing or starting some sort of like self-care kind of thing. It's more than that. It is more than that. And it's, it's talked about so much in the Bible that another reason why it's so important to share it with you guys and for us all to start practicing it. And I think the more we practice it, the less people will look down upon it. And gratitude is actually really helpful on like so many different levels of not just like saying it and like doing some sort of, you know, check mark on your list <laugh>. Um, it actually can like really strengthen relationships when we have gratitude for, uh, what the other people are doing and really, uh, calling that out and being like, I'm so grateful for you, like stepping in when I didn't realize I needed it. Or things like that, you know, in those relationships, whether it's romantic or just platonic or, or mentor or work or, or whatever it might be. Um, it also helps to reduce stress because we're just basking in the joy and the comfort of all these things that we are blessed with rather than zeroing and focusing so hard on our problems, which is not healthy. It can also be healthier for our physical body because it might help you end up lowering your blood pressure because again, you don't have this like full force focus on all your problems, your struggles, your issues, all the things that you feel like are tanking are going wrong in your life, right? So it just kind of gives you, again, that reprieve and then you can like kind of breathe easy, breathe easier, like literally, and not feel like everything is caving in. Um, it could also help you to foster stronger resilience and be able to bounce back from things because you're able to reflect on the good things that are happening in your life. And so you don't have to feel like you have to hang out and you're pit of despair and you're able to just be like, wait. Oh hold on. Life is good, life is great. And you know, I'm grateful that I was able to figure out or uh, you know, have blessed with like the knowledge of what to do last time when I had to go through a problem like this. I know how to get through it this time. Let's put all that knowledge to work. Here we go. You know what I mean? Like, let's bounce back. We can't do this. And you also, you know, when you have in practice gratitude, you just have a more positive mindset just in general, right? Because you're really reflecting on these really good things. Even if you were reflecting on the hard things and how they turned out really well and presented to you with an opportunity that had the opportunity or the option to even look at or even, uh, experience or understand or have laid out for you. You know? And, and so you're just, you're feeling more full, you're feeling more joy, you're feeling more happiness. Uh, but the thing that I love most above all of those things about gratitude is how it really just magnifies our Lord and Savior in everything that he is doing for us and helping us get through and how that makes him shine even more to show other people how he can do the same for them. So here is my first scripture and I have like three of them to share with you today that I think will be very beneficial in attaching and the understanding of gratitude to your life and how important it's and how we can become more grateful. So in the book of Psalms chapter nine verse one, it says, I will praise you Lord with all my heart. I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done. I'll praise you Lord, with all my heart. I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done. I just had to read it twice because it's just so good. And so we take time to praise God. We thank him when we are so grateful for all the amazing things that He is continuing to pull us through and push us through, through. It's just, it, it's, it's hard to not feel grateful because things are just going better. Even if it's a really hard time, it's just going better. The struggle is not as bad as it might have been without him. Um, and so that's why I exude so much gratitude all the time because of all the things he's doing for us. And I know that some people believe that being grateful is like super cheesy and overdone and unnecessary unless you are, you know, thanking someone like directly like for something that they did and that it's not something that will actually help us feel better despite the fact that I gave you like four or five examples of how, you know, gratitude can be beneficial in our lives. Um, but if we do allow ourselves to truly feel the emotions of gratitude, actually feeling like really full of being thankful that this thing happened or that you were able to come through this or that this person was able to come help you and that joy and the comfort and the peace and the fo and like the fulfillment of like being able to get past this thing or having experienced this thing. If you let yourself actually fully feel the entire emotions of gratitude, it'll make more sense why it's necessary in our lives and why it is such a cool experience. It's why the reason why it's just can be so fulfilling and so meaningful for us. And I know a lot of us struggle with allowing us to feel our emotions cuz we're afraid of the repercussions that might come from doing so. But honestly we, it's so good to feel your emotions and understand them. It's just really like the action that you take afterwards that can get you into trouble. And so it's important that if you are feeling your emotions through that, if you do need to take some sort of action, you need to make sure that you are responding and not reacting and making the best decisions that are beneficial for what you're currently experiencing. But it is so beautiful. So if we allow ourselves to just open up and really feel everything that comes truly with gratitude, that you may be pressing out, you're missing out and you need to just allow it to all sink in. And also the opportunity to thank God for anything and everything literally is always there. So if it's easier for you to actually thank someone like for something they did or allowed you to do, uh, thank him, thank the Lord, thank God for everything. Because we may think that there are things that we do in our own strength. I'm sure a lot of us go about our day thinking, oh my gosh, I was able to really talk that person out of being upset despite the mistake that I made. Or I was able to, you know, talk myself into that job or I was able to, you know, um, uh, provide the best, you know, I don't know, um, proposal to this to my partner so that they would say yes to getting married to me or like whatever it is, are you able to produce the best content online that's really getting a ton of engagement, right? And you think that you're doing all of these things in your own strength, but in reality we are being strengthened by him, by God in anything and everything we do and we should be giving him thanks and uh, feeling gratitude and so grateful for everything that he's doing and give him all that appreciation as much as possible because he is like continually always working and helping us with everything that we are doing. Here's another verse I paused because like, here's another verse that I think will really help you understand well, it'll be a good reminder of like being thankful but it has multiple meanings and we'll get into that in just a second. So in the book of First Thessalonians chapter five, verses 16 through 18, it says, always be joyful, never stop praying, be thankful in all circumstances for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. And when we show gratefulness, we need to not forget all the hard stuff. So I've kind of mentioned it already a couple times, but it's so much easier to have gratitude and have thankfulness for when we are blessed with so many opportunities. When we like move up the stairs, up the ladder, up the chain, whatever it is, hit milestones, progress points, get the things that we want, get the things that naturally bring us happiness and bring us joy. However, we need to remember that we can also have gratefulness and thankfulness for those really hard times for the lessons that we had to learn too. It's there like for wills, we can, it takes a lot more work to do that of course, but we can do it and it's not as easy to feel, you know, thankful for the hard things that we have gone through. And it's not as fun as getting something and experiencing something that we've been looking forward to, um, because gifts and opportunities are like bam, you know, instant party, instant fun. But as verse 16 of the scripture that I just read you, because not only are we talking about being thankful in all circumstances, that's not just the positive ones, it's also the really hard ones too. We also need to always be joyful. We need to always experience joy. And that's even in the hard times and for me personally, I'm not perfect at it. No one's perfect in anything just so you know. And you can be really good at it and sometimes in some seasons of life and then really bad at it and have to like continue to remind yourself to always be joyful in everything while you are also being thankful for all circumstances. So if life is really, really sucking, you still have to find a way to have joy for everything always. And I think it just takes that moment of really digging down deeply and being like, okay, I can have joy in this situation because I'm still here. I'm still fighting, I'm still pushing through, I still have been blessed with all these other opportunities. I still have the resilience that I built up last time. I still know that I'm going to be able to survive after this happens because I have in the past. And even if this brings more new brands thinking, new um, experiences still be able to do it and God's on your side. So we need to know that we need to always be joyful and there will be times where we will feel sad and disappointed and angry, but if we can like, you know, pull that joy back in, it'll help to comfort us during those times along with like, you know, cuz God is supplying that joy and if you allow him to, then it'll be so much easier than trying to manufacture it yourself. Because I'm sure a lot of people could read this as always, like always be joyful and then you go to other places to find that joy, that quote unquote joy. You know, whether it's just like uh, stress eating or whether you're drinking or doing drugs or hanging out with people that you shouldn't and then and entertaining activities that you shouldn't be doing, that kind of thing. But no, it's speaking on always be joyful, always like finding that joy in the Lord cuz he can provide it to you. Here is the last scripture that I wanna share with you for this episode. So another verse says in the book of James chapter one, verses two through four, my fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties, see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can for. You know that when your faith is tested, it stirs up in you the power of endurance. And then as your endurance grows even stronger, it will release perfection into every part of your being until there is nothing missing and nothing lacking. So you can have joy despite the really hard times and learning lessons and opportunities that you're going through and that you know that when your faith is tested you'll continue to build up, endurance the power of endurance, you'll continue to become even more resilient. And so it's important for us to realize, yes, those hard times really suck, but those hard times we can be grateful for as well because they will make us an even better version of our best selves. And so when we give God all the glory, we stir up our own hearts to have like stronger, deeper trust and belief in him as well as to honor him in how he takes care of us. And how he can do that again for everyone else if they're willing to just give their hearts to him and dedicate their life in the name of Christ. So when we practice gratitude just in general, you know, we remind ourselves that not everything in life is bad. It's not, you might think it is because it's so easy to like really magnify the bad things. Zoom in on the bad things, have a perspective of only the things that are getting in the way of ha of you having control over what's happening at every moment in your life. When we truly do not have control other than how we respond and react to what's coming at us in life, it's truly the truth. It's truly the facts. You may not wanna believe it because you still believe that you've had experiences or you had control over everything, but that's not exactly what life is gonna be like the majority of the time. It's just, it just happened to be that way and maybe God orchestrated that way so that things would work out for the best. But it's not always gonna be that way, it's just, it's just not. And so not everything is a problem to solve, you know, and not every problem or bad thing we have experienced is something to hate. We don't, we don't have to hate every single experience. We can actually just feel neutral about it if we don't wanna like go on the other spectrum of super happy cuz some things are really bad and really hard. We can at least hit that neutral point where we're like, it's not this terrible hatred thing, you know? And we can exhibit gratitude for these more difficult times that teach us lessons that we may not learn otherwise and also teach us so much about ourselves. Teach us so much about ourselves and our ability to persevere, which is so stinking important. Um, but maybe you struggle with being grateful for everything in your life and that's okay and that's maybe like, maybe that's why you're like listening today. Um, but that's no issue because I am here to chat with you about it and I have five tips that I think would be the best for you and how to become grateful in for everything, how to become more grateful for everything in your life. But first, as always, I need to deliver our fanastic disclaimer. So here is my quick disclaimer, the dips and advice that I'm about to give you and the is all based on my own knowledge and research and the my personal experience and the experience of others that I am allowed to share with you. And if you feel like everything that has to do with what I've already shared with you and what I'm about to share with you does not align with what you believe would help you become your most grateful self towards everything in your life, then I encourage you to seek a therapist or a counselor to have that one-on-one time to figure out what would best align with you to discover how to become, yeah, more grateful for everything in your life and maybe that will really help you help maybe that'll really help you. Uh, if you don't wanna do that, I encourage you to go to our best friend, say it with me, everyone Google and type in some keywords of how to practice gratitude or becoming more thankful. And you'll come up with so many podcasts, videos, blogs, social media posts, podcasts, all these other things that could really help you and point you in the direction of what would align with you best for you to figure out how you can be more grateful in everything in your life. Because not all advice on the internet is gonna work for you all the time, even if it has worked in the past and it could work again in the future, but it doesn't all align all the time and that's okay. So there's that here, let's jump in. Here are five tips that I would use when needing to know how to become your most grateful self for everything in your life. Number one, become more mindful with awe and wonder. Become more mindful with awe and wonder. So practice mindfulness by being present in your life every single day. So just as much as you possibly can. So being mindful just means that you are present in what's happening right now. You're not all wrapped up in what could happen in the future and what did happen in the past. You're right here, right now, this moment. How can you just like soak it all in who you're talking to, where you're with wow, who you are talking to, uh, who you are with, where you are at, what you are doing, how you are feeling about that and how that can influence the rest of your day and how you can actually enjoy the rest of your day and take in the sights and the sounds and everything around you that you might cloud out. Cuz you're so focused on what happened in the past and what may or may not happen in the future. And also just appreciate everything, like what's happening in your life right now and maybe what you have more time for because you are no longer, you know, harping so much on what happened in the past or what could be in the future, right? You just give yourself so much time to really be right here today, right now, right now, and also experience the awe and wonder and I sometimes think curiosity for everything around you and build up more appreciation and gratitude with those things. So think about the beauty of nature. Often when I'm taking walks these days, I'll take pictures of all like the beautiful trees blossoming and flowers and the sky and the green grass and the sun and all these things cuz I am in total awe and wonder really experiencing in, in totality and fullness those moments and being grateful for that beautiful nature around me that has just really, you know, um, bordered the walk that I'm taking and helping me enjoy it even more. You know, all this beautiful god's creation and uh, you can have the on wonder of other people's kindness to you. Maybe you have someone that's so super kind every time you go and get your morning coffee or breakfast even when people are total jerks to them, they're just exhibit this kindness and grace that is just so like, draws out so much awe and wondered maybe even curiosity of how they continue to do that day after day after day. And really just being grateful for people like that, you know, because you probably have been rude to someone in, in your past as well. And you know, kind people just like keep on pushing through or even like the curiosity of something unexpected happening. And this could be something that really sucks or something that's just like, oh that's just like randomly happened and wow, I wonder why this happened. But not in some sort of anxiety, more of like, wow, I wonder how this came about and like, who made these decisions and you know, um, how will I feel about this later? But you know, how do I feel about it now? And, and, and like who influenced this and what does everyone else think about this, right? But not with a like background of anxiety around it. More of like curiosity, more of like, oh my goodness, like this unexpected thing happened, let's learn more. You know what I mean? So become more mindful with awe and wonder. Really stay in the present as much as you can. Appreciate all the things around you and just really soak them in and enjoy them as much as you can. Cuz you'll find so much gratitude in being able to do that. And it'll also help you kinda like slow your roll a little bit to just take in everything, be grateful for the wonderful scenery and everything we have that will just kind of like adds in to the beauty of our lives. Number two. Number two, we're, we're, we're jumping, we're jumping in with both feet here.<laugh>, uh, practice acceptance and forgiveness. Practice acceptance and forgiveness. So I'm just here to remind you again, as I do often in different kinds of episodes, stop holding onto painful feelings and experiences for the sake of holding it against someone. Like there's no reason it's, it's pointless. It's, it's, it's a fruitful task I'm telling you. And it benefits no one. You think it hurts them, it probably doesn't anymore. Maybe it did for a while but no longer and you think it helps you feel better, but I'm willing to bet that it doesn't. I'm willing to bet that it actually makes you feel so much worse but you pretend it makes you feel better because it continues to renew to continue to be like this. Um, but we really need to just practice forgiveness by letting go of those grievances and moving on in your life. And I know that a lot of people would be like, yeah, forgive, but don't forget. And I would say if you are able to forget and not just continually store that memory in your mind to, you know, pop back into at some point in the, in the near future to like relive it and maybe like re harden your heart against that person, I would say let's not do that if there's no reason to, right? Unless there's like a legitimate safety issue that you need to address. Even then you could kind of just let it go. But still, you know, create and implement and enforce personal boundaries to keep you safe but still not continue to harbor those feelings that will possibly try to make someone else feel bad uh, by pressing on that guilt and shame. You know what I mean? Even though we all choose our own emotions and feelings and how we feel sometimes when we try hard enough we can convince someone to feel that way and that's just not how we should be acting. So practice forgiveness, also become more accepting of unexpected situations. Just become more flexible, more ease of getting through your day and what you're gonna go through because the unexpected happens all the time and we cannot dodge every experience of these things. We just cannot. And so not everything will go as hoped or as we had planned. And if we have control issues, which I feel like I used to have like the worst control issues and it's like slowly fading away, thankfully due to the Lord helping with that, I thought that I just needed to have everything. And so when any little unexpected thing happened, I would just blow up. It would be so bad I would have no flexibility because everything so perfect with like five backup plans and it still fell apart. So, and it's not that like a lot of those backup plans did work in other times, but there's gonna be times a lot where it just doesn't work out and it's better just to accept that now and let it go and know that we'll still be able to power through, especially if we're able to, you know, call on the Lord and ask him for help. But it's not all gonna go as we want. And so we still have to remember that we can't experience gratitude in the disappointment that we're going through because we have other things to be grateful for despite what's falling apart, despite what really, really sucks at the time. We can still be grateful for the good things that are happening in our life and how we have that faith and belief that we're gonna be able to get through this experience and how we still have uh, people that will comfort us and that we can lean on, that we can gain support from as we get through this. And we can be grateful for those things, that support system that we'll have despite these hard right now. You know, and accept and appreciate how far you got. So you're probably like, I'm just really upset. I was supposed to finish this project and I couldn't. Or I was supposed to finish training for the race but I couldn't. Or I was supposed to do this, that and the other or whatever and I didn't. But appreciate how far you got in the process and how much work and effort you got into it and what you can glean from that for the next time and that you got that far and maybe a lot of people haven't or they have but they weren't you. And that means so much. Also, you know, think about what you were able to learn while you got through that process and how far you got because that knowledge and wisdom is going to be really helpful to you at some point in the future. And so it's not all just like for nothing and that these types of situations are what help us become stronger. Uh, failures and mistakes are one of life's best learning lessons because we're able to reflect on what happened and glean all the information that we need to take with us into the future and they just help us grow and they also help us have God continue to work through us and exhibit his mighty hand in ability to help us in these times to other people so that they will also realize the amazingness of God and give their life to him, which I think is absolutely fantastic, of course. Um, so practice forgiveness and acceptance. So super, super duper, super duper important. Uh, number three is give back to others, give back to others. So spend some time giving back to others which will help you reflect on how blessed that you are in your own life. So maybe you give back to people, uh, build like those little, those little bags with all the cool um, stuff in it for the homeless people and the people that have to sleep outside or sleep in the, you know, tent cities and things like that. And then you give those to them and you reflect on how you don't have to sleep outside in a tent. You get to sleep in a home. And even though you have your own problems and issues and dramas that are happening in your own house, at least you're sleeping in a house that has walls. And yes, maybe it might be a little bit warm because you don't up yet cuz summer came early, but still you're still in a productive environment where you were less likely to get hurt by the elements outside and the, you know, nature around us that you're still grateful for that for being able to have a shower and have people to talk to and to lean on and maybe a car and money and a job and all of these things, right? And so I feel like when we go and help others, it should not be to induce shame for us to feel grateful, it should be inducing like, oh my gosh, I'm so able, I'm so grateful. I am able to give to them and also reflect on how grateful I am for my life and to not take it for granted. Again, not inducing shame on yourself, just really like reflecting on the amazing blessings that we have in our life. And also realize that your problems aren't like better or worse than anyone else's. I truly believe that God like will give us what we can handle and we can all handle different things and we might not be able to handle something as big as like, you know, a family member's health, um, kind of like failing and having to go through that struggle. But maybe you are more equipped to deal with a struggle that has to do with um, work or losing your job or some sort of financial pressures, right? And where other people are strong enough to go through the sadness and the despair of losing a child before they were able to be born on this earth. And cuz God knew that they would be strengthened through able to get through it. And you know, it's, and it's not that God is causing these things to happen, they were just happening, but he is, uh, if we call on him, we were able to be equipped to get through with these situations. And so again, it's just a reminder that your problems aren't better or worse than other people. But we can be grateful that we aren't going through other certain situations that we feel like we just wouldn't be equipped for, that God could, could equip us for if, equip us for if we had to go through those things, but we're just grateful, like, okay, wow, I'm grateful I'm not going through that, but I am able to get through this and it's gonna be okay. Right? And also recognize the sense of purpose and fulfillment that we can gain from helping other people in giving back to them. Thus bringing like this gratitude of all these feelings that we have of feeling fulfilled and, and feeling like we're pur purposeful and doing something to, you know, benefit others. And we're just so grateful for having those feelings and being able to do something outside of ourselves that isn't just focused on us. You know what I mean? So give back to others. The fourth one I wanna share with you is comfort. Negative thoughts with gratitude. Comfort, negative thoughts with gratitude. So what I mean by this is that you're gonna have negative thoughts, you know, it's healthy to express how you feel, feel angry, you feel disappointed, depressed, uh, sad, uh, confused, frustrated, whatever it is. It's healthy to have these feelings, but it's usually the actions that take place after is that that's what usually gets you in trouble, which is why I always talk about responding versus reacting and responding always comes with a delay because you wanna make sure that what you're gonna do or say after that is gonna be beneficial to the whole situation. So it's, it's healthy to have these feelings. You just have to make sure that whatever actions may might be taken are the best ones and then when you express, you know, express how you feel, but then also couple that with something that's more positive and that you're grateful for. So I did give, I did write a couple examples for you. So the first one is like, today was a really tough day at work, but I'm grateful that I get to go home and watch my favorite show after dinner or I get to order a takeout or I get to go hang out with my friend. And so it's like, yeah, you had a really tough day at work and that really sucks and you could just spend all your time focused on that but you're still grateful that you get to go do something really fun after work or you were able to have a really good cup of coffee that got through through that whole mess of a day of work, things like that. The second example I have for you guys is that fight with my spouse was really emotional, but I'm grateful we were able to share our feelings instead of keeping it all inside and becoming bitter. So it's like, yeah, you went through this argument, this fight, this disagreement with your spouse, with your partner and it's not fun, right? Because like you're getting, it might be getting heated and maybe people's feelings might get hurt, but you can find gratitude and you guys actually being able to share what's going on in your hearts and your minds rather than keeping it all bottled up and bitterness building up and then maybe passive aggressive behavior and not really dealing with it and communicating those things on the most healthy level. The last one example I have for you is probably like the most extreme says, it really sucks. I lost my job and I don't know how I'm going to be financially, but I know I have enough skills to get a job somewhere until I find that better fit that aligns more with my goals. Now I'm not saying that you would immediately feel this way, but hopefully shortly after if you continue to make yeah, maybe you did lose your job. Maybe you know, it's just like you're furloughed or you were just let go in the like a massive like fire like we've had in the last couple years that you've heard of in the news from these big companies. And so you're like, this really sucks. I don't know how I'm gonna pay my bills now maybe I didn't save enough for savings. Like whatever the situation is or you were already behind. But you can still find comfort and gratitude in knowing that okay, well I have good general skills, I can find something temporarily and then maybe this will offer you the opportunity to finally like go and get your dream job or your dream opportunity. And if you're here to tell me like, oh that was already my dream job for dream opportunity Sabrina, maybe it really wasn't because it didn't like stick. Or maybe it is, but it's, but the actual real dream and real opportunity is with will find by finding gratitude in this situation happening and knowing that all you need to do is call on our Lord and Savior and he will help you get through this really hard time. You just need to continue to have peace and joy about it and believe and have hope and faith in him. He'll come through. And so you can have these negative thoughts, these hard feelings, these, these feelings are just like you're so upset or however you feel, but if you're able to couple it with something that is you know, more positive, it won't feel like it's going to push you down into your repetitive despair where you feel like you're lost and you can't climb out at any point because it just feels so dark. No, you are actually injecting a little bit of light in that really, really tough situation and you're able to be grateful and let that gratuity, let that gratefulness gratuity, let that gratefulness be a shining light to really like crack open your heart and your mind and maybe even see things from a different perspective that'll help you to continue to move forward. Okay, so number five and the last one I wanna share with you today is to keep a log of your gratitude. Keep a log of your gratitude. Very classic examples. Something that I think that we could all do I need to do better as well. I was even thinking about that when I was writing the notes. I was like man, I need to do way better at this. And I do think this is really important. So I would suggest that it can be in a journal, like a written journal, a notepad, a whiteboard, maybe even the notes app on your phone. But have a place that you can write down what you're grateful for every single day, as much as you can remember. And I always suggest for the longest time that you come up with at least four things, four things every single day because three just feels too easy and five could be really difficult or you might give up on the practice sooner than you should and you shouldn't, but you should. But that happens, right? And so just come up with four and they can be really big, really small, medium size, really big would be like, I'm grateful for a roof over my head and food in my tummy and money in my bank account. A really small one could be, you're super grateful that you were able to see that really pretty robin right outside your bedroom window when you woke up. And that just like created so much joy in your heart. A media one could be like, oh I'm so grateful that the weather cooled off and I was able to go on a long walk with my dog after work because that is what really helped you de-stress. So it could be a range of things and that's what really open their hearts and their minds to what they can be grateful for. Because I feel like we can only, a lot of people believe they can only be grateful for really big things when you literally could be grateful for anything you could be grateful for. You know, when you got your cup of coffee this morning, it tastes like the best cup of coffee you've had in so long. Or you make it at home and you're like, man, I made a really good cup of coffee. I'm so grateful for that cuz that is really going to impact my day like so much in a positive way. And there's nothing wrong with that. So push yourself to have at least four things every single day and then encourage others to pick up this practice as well. And then maybe you can exchange like what you're grateful for, a couple things like maybe every few days. And that could really build in the accountability of also inspire other people for what they can be grateful for if again, they're kind of stuck on like, oh my gosh, I can't be grateful for the same four things every day. No, you can switch it up. Maybe you're grateful this might, this might be harbor on the edge, but maybe you're grateful for the fact that your car didn't make any weird noises today when you drove to work and back home again and you're grateful that maybe that whole worry is could be like behind you and you don't have to worry about your car and you really shouldn't be worrying about those things anyway cuz God can help us through. But I understand we're all, we're all human, we all make mistakes. We are not perfect. I didn't mean the mistakes part, I mean I did but that didn't really go with what I was saying. We all like are not perfect. So we will find ourselves in worry and anger and disappointment and confusion and frustration I do myself. And but then we can like write it and be like, you know what? I am worried but I don't wanna be worried cuz God will help me through this thing. And so you could just be grateful that, whoa, my car stopped making that crazy sound. Okay, I'm grateful for that. We can move forward and not worry about that anymore. Thanks, God <laugh>. So keep a log of your gratitude again in your phone, notepad, uh, whiteboard journal, whatever it is, voice notes, just like find a log so that you know, 3, 6, 9, 12 months from now, you can reflect on what you're grateful then and what for you're grateful for now and how far you've come and all the amazing things and blessings that you've had in your life. And also when you're going through a really hard time to be grateful, if you're keeping a log of things that you are grateful for, you can like look back on that and realize all the things that you are grateful for and all the blessings that you've had in your life and how great your life is and how you don't need to focus so hard on the hard things when you have this log and this proof of all these amazing, wonderful things happening to you on the front. But that's it. That's all five tips I have for you and how to become more grateful for everything in your entire life. And I really hope that it has helped you to understand and know how to be more grateful each and every day. So thank you so much for listening to The Real Positive Girl podcast again with me, Sabrina. I appreciate every single one of you for downloading, sharing and listening to the show. It means so much to me. If you ever have any feedback or have a prayer request, uh, topic, suggestion, whatever you have, please pop down to the show notes. You'll see where you can email me at real positive girl podcast gmail.com. But until next time, have a good one and I look forward to seeing all of you guys in the next one. Bye, you guys.